I have spent two decades being a surrogate father to players and helping them In a holistic sense along the way. Many have had wounds from their family situation and need healing and guidance. Throughout the years, the idea of being a good father has came to the forefront of my priorities. It has replaced the hunt for money, wins, extensions, and the next best job. Being a dad that I can be proud of is basically the only thing I want to get right on my time here on earth. However, the demands on my time, schedule and geography constantly pull me away from my one true priority. I begin to see the same wounds on my own children because the business is not " family friendly." I have worked for bosses who have no family and don't care if they leave yours In a wreck on their way to coaching success. They have all got extensions and bonuses and I paid the ultimate price. The amount of little league games, and other activities I missed building someone else's dream is nauseating. I am now more concerned with what my kids think about me than my AD, head coach, or agent. I want to be the Dad I wish all my players had. The Dad that I wish I had. The Dad that can look back with no regrets on his impact and influence over the ones that God gave him. I no longer want to rob myself of true riches of fatherhood in pursuit of basketball .
I encourage all coaches to not leave their family in their wake of professional gain. This profession will leave you empty and shallow without sharing it with those in your circle. Recruit your kids!! Coach their heart! Lead from an authentic core. Don't make the mistakes I've made trying to please a boss and working 90 hours a week. Invest in things that matter!! Choose love over the lust for more. A fathers heart - protects, provides, inspires, challenges, and prepares. Coach from that heart and you'll truly win!
John Marcum is the assistant womens basketball coach at Grand Canyon. A 18 year coaching veteran he has coached at East Carolina, Indiana State and also served as the head coach at Cal Baptist University. He is the proud father of Abby, Matty and Cooper Marcum.